Fugitive rape accused Nithyananda is not only an assault to the law, but to the senses as well
It's a serious question how someone charged with abduction, assault, rape, kidnapping, and embezzlement (to name a few) fled from one country and founded another one, but Nithyananda has been a rage on social media for his series of outlandish and preposterous claims on anything under the sun, and even the sun itself.
Fugitive rape-accused and self-proclaimed ‘godman’ Nithyananda has once again become the talk of the nation, for founding a new nation (??????).
While it's a serious question how someone charged with abduction, assault, rape, kidnapping, and embezzlement (to name a few) has fled from one country and founded another one, Nithyananda has been a rage on social media for his series of outlandish and preposterous claims on anything under the sun, and even the sun itself.
Although we must not let his bizarre claims and visions dilute his alleged crimes, we have to note that his videos are sometimes as much of an assault on our senses, as his acts assault the rule of law.
We don't want to be the only ones suffering, so it's your turn to take one for the team.
The one with a start-up plan catering to reincarnating billionaires
Along with the JNU professor (surprise, surprise) and Hindutva ideologue Rajiv Malhotra, our Sex-Swami Nithyanand proposed a mad start-up plan for billionaires. Malhotra and the founder of the latest nation proposed this genius idea where they'd help billionaires like Bill Gates and Warren Buffet to save their wealth.
These two concerned souls said that if Bill Gates gives them $50 billion out of his $100 billion, they can return that to him when he's reincarnated as a poor person by installing a GPS on Bill's Jivaatma. (#GPSonJivaatma: your next t-shirt quote)
The one where he takes us down the rabbit-hole
There is inception, there is an acid trip, and then there is this video of Nithyananda. It opens with him smiling like there's no tomorrow and looking like a Sanjay Leela Bhansali extra. Then the magic begins.
Some wild yellow CGI appears around his head like a horrendous halo as if the universe is giving him a golden shower. His entire body looks like what the Milkyway galaxy might have looked like if Picasso had painted that during his bleu period. Then there's a hip-hop song with the lyrics, "I see you, I'm dumbstruck, my heart goes dhak-dhak". Yeah...words barely do it justice.
The one where he promised to make animals speak
How many times have you wanted your pet tiger to drop pearls of wisdom? How many times must the Gau-rakshaks have wanted their Gau-mata to speak to them? Well, our big baba has a solution.
Keep in mind that my baba is scientific! He claimed that he had just casually tested software that would grow vocal cords in animals like tigers, cows, and monkeys through a 'superconscious breakthrough' and they'd be talking to him in Sanskrit and Tamil. Boom Shivah!
The one where he fled from the country with an expired passport
See, the Paramhansa is a man of many talents. He is known to put chillies, human hair, and marijuana seeds in his midnight fire rituals. So it's possible that some of that marijuana smoke got into the airport security of our country. While our devoted police forces did reject his appeal to renew his passport, somehow the Paramashivam managed to transport the him in him, to the him in a me of a different country, where he and me became him and superconscious illegality found Siddha. Yeah, Bengaluru has the best stuff.
(An absolutely unrelated image | Source: The Indian Express Archives)
The one where he showed Einstein his place
According to the Paramhansa, "Energy is anything intense", so I guess his ideas have a lot of energy. Because the Sex-Swami clearly destroys Einstein and his claim to fame. I mean how could Einstein's 'non-veg crooked brain' have seen beyond the 'ups and downs'. Remember kids, "Yeem and Cee and not MC, but YeemCeeeeeeeee".
"About 6–7 years ago, he was truly as enlightened a soul in 7D vibration as Budhha, Sadhguru and others are, and he achieved the “performance” to drop down. Now he is a soul at just 3.7D as any average Joe on this planet."
-Someone on Nithyananda on Quora